Recently, during a gathering with a few friends, the topic of love came up, and everyone unanimously expressed that understanding a woman's mind in a relationship is like deciphering a complex book. Sometimes, when she says "I'm fine," her heart might be in turmoil; other times, when she seems angry, she might just be seeking a bit more attention. This reminded me of a saying I once heard: "A woman's words are often not as simple as their literal meaning."
This brings to mind the story of a friend, Xiao A. She was in a relationship with her boyfriend for four years, but eventually, she was the one who initiated the breakup. At the time, many felt it was a pity, and some even labeled her as "heartless." However, Xiao A told me that she clearly knew what she wanted and didn't want to waste herself in an unsuitable relationship anymore. After the breakup, she actually lived better and felt much more relaxed. This made me realize that sometimes being a bit "heartless" isn't necessarily a bad thing, at least it means taking responsibility for oneself.
In fact, women in love often find themselves in a dilemma: they want to fully commit, yet they fear losing themselves. Like my own experience, initially, I was always careful to remember the other's preferences, even delving into areas he liked, even if I wasn't good at them. But as time passed, the novelty faded, and conflicts began to emerge. Complaints like "Why didn't you message me today?" or "Why can't you even remember our anniversary?" actually hide a longing for security and importance.
Later, I gradually understood that love is not a competition that one must win, but an adventure of growth. Like Han Su in "Semi-Mature Men and Women," she bought those red-bottomed high heels through her own efforts, not waiting for someone else to give them to her. This kind of independence and clarity is the true essence of a leading lady. In love, we can be as invested as a "love fool," but we must also learn to step back at the right time and see our own needs clearly.
A netizen commented: "The hardest part of love is not the beginning, but the end." Indeed, many people continue to linger in an unhealthy relationship because they can't bear the "sunk cost." But as Shi Tiesheng said, "Love is originally the moment when self-abandonment turns to light." We don't need to negate ourselves because of the end of a relationship; instead, we should learn to love ourselves and find our own romance from it.
So, if you also feel confused in love, try to step out of the emotional whirlpool and ask yourself: Has this relationship made me better? If the answer is no, then bravely let go. After all, the margin for error in life is much higher than we imagine. There"s nothing wrong with love itself, but learning to let go is the true growth.
Finally, here's a quote for everyone: "Loving yourself is the beginning of a lifelong romance." May we all find our own balance in love, enjoying the sweetness while staying clear-headed.