Recently, while chatting with friends, we stumbled upon a very interesting topic: how should one respond when a girl says "I'm going to sleep" or "I don't feel anything"? Honestly, this is really a headache-inducing problem, especially when you have feelings for the other person. Such words can feel like a bucket of cold water poured over your head. However, after some research and contemplation, I found that there are actually many nuances to this, and today I want to share my insights with you.
First, when a girl says "I'm going to sleep," many people's first reaction might be "Oh, then rest early," and then the conversation abruptly ends. In fact, while this response is polite, it might make her feel like you're not interested in her. A better approach is to add a bit of interaction, such as: "Then rest early, have sweet dreams, and remember to tell me what you dreamt about tomorrow!" This way, you express concern and also set the stage for the next conversation. Of course, if you're quite familiar with each other, you could also make a small joke: "Sleep well, see you in my dreams!" This light-hearted tone will make her feel that you're fun, rather than a rigid "goodnight robot."
However, sometimes when a girl says "I'm going to sleep," she might not actually be tired but wants to end the conversation. At this point, you need to learn to "read the air." If she was previously engaged in the conversation and suddenly says "I'm going to sleep," she might genuinely be tired; but if her responses have been consistently cold, she might be hinting that "I don't want to chat anymore." In this case, trying to keep her engaged might backfire, and it's better to graciously say: "Alright, rest well, let's chat another time." This shows that you're considerate without making her feel like you're too clingy.
Next, let"s talk about the topic of "no feelings." Honestly, this phrase is both loved and hated. It's loved for its straightforwardness, but hated for its vagueness—what exactly are "feelings"? Actually, feelings are a kind of emotional need, just like wanting to eat when you're hungry or wanting to sleep when you're tired. When a girl says "no feelings," it means she doesn't have that emotional need for you. You might feel wronged: "I treat her so well, why doesn't she feel anything?" But feelings are not something that can be earned through one-sided effort.
A netizen in the comments section put it well: "Feelings are the reactions of the heart." Indeed, feelings are very subjective. No matter how well you treat her, if her heart doesn't have that "desire," everything is in vain. It's like you might be happy because of a cup of milk tea, but if the other person doesn't like sweets, the best milk tea would still be indifferent to her. So, the key is to find her "needs," rather than indulging in self-moved efforts.
Another important point is attraction. Attraction is the foundation of feelings; without it, no amount of effort will do anything but feel like a burden. A netizen in the comments mentioned: "No feelings mean there's distance, or it's because of the distance that there are no feelings." This makes a lot of sense. Attraction often comes from a sense of "unattainability," like craving food when you see a late-night food video, even though you know you shouldn't eat. So, maintaining a bit of distance and adding a bit of mystery can actually make her more interested in you.
Finally, I want to say that feelings really can"t be forced. When a girl says "no feelings," instead of clinging desperately, it's better to learn to let go, or continue to interact as friends. After all, feelings are a two-way street, and one-sided efforts will only tire you out more. As another netizen in the comments said: "Losing confidence in you, whether you're there or not, means it's time to leave you." Sometimes, letting go is also a kind of wisdom.
In conclusion, whether it"s responding to "I'm going to sleep" or deciphering "no feelings," the key is to learn to think from the other person's perspective. Feelings are not a game, but a two-way interaction. I hope today's sharing can bring some inspiration to everyone, and I also welcome everyone to share their views and experiences in the comments section!
