Many people think that in a marriage, not speaking because of a quarrel is considered cold violence. However, an important indicator to define cold violence is the state of mind of the silent person. Therefore, not speaking may not be considered cold violence. In that case, marriage What does cold violence look like in "Cold violence"?
Cold violence is a purposeful strategy for dealing with conflicts.
People who initiate cold violence have expectations for the effects of their silence, such as forcing the other party to compromise with them, punishing the other party for their mistakes, forcing the other party to leave the relationship voluntarily, etc.
The corresponding psychological state of cold violence is attack. Silent people are calm and watch the effects of cold violence. Sometimes they even feel proud that they have everything under control.
If you do not fit the description I gave above, you do not belong to the Cold War, but to the Cold War.
The Cold War is not strategic, it is a passive way of dealing with conflicts. Those who initiate the Cold War are often suffering from extreme emotions themselves.
For example, being unable to bear the other party’s accusations and incomprehension, being aggrieved and unable to explain, and just want to be quiet, such as being angry by the other party’s behavior Speechless, wait.
The psychological state corresponding to the Cold War is avoidance and escape. The silent person's mood is more inclined to anxiety, disappointment, and loss. Subconsciously, he hopes that the other party can take the initiative to comfort and understand.
If you are suffering every day when you are not talking to the other person, and are hit by all kinds of negative emotions. Sometimes you feel wronged, and sometimes you have self-doubt, and you are unable to concentrate on doing anything, you are actually a victim of the Cold War. .
In fact, whether it is cold violence or cold war, it means that your marriage is facing a serious dilemma.
If positive measures are not taken, the situation will definitely get worse.
After all, if two people always start with a heated argument and end with a cold war, then both parties will soon become afraid of communication. There will be too many conflicts between husband and wife that are not properly handled.
Over time, the estrangement accumulates in each other's hearts, evolving into extramarital affairs, emotional freeze and other marital crises that are more difficult to repair.
So no matter what the situation is, you need to do some homework on marriage management based on your own situation, change the communication mode between husband and wife, and rebuild a positive and active way of handling conflicts.
