I don’t know what everyone thinks about freshness, but I know that many people will habitually look for the next person who can bring freshness to them when the freshness wears off. I think about this approach There is only one thing to say! What a scumbag.
Because novelty is not about repeating the same thing with different people, but about experiencing different things with one person, so today we Let’s take a look at the tips for men and women to keep things fresh. I hope that after reading this, you can all get rid of the title of scumbag, and at the same time, you can have a long-term relationship with the woman next to you.
What I share today is a love language mentioned in "Attachment and Intimacy", called A.R.E dialogue, which can help us lead love to a safer path. The premise is that there is still love, and it is suitable for two people in a relationship crisis.
The main steps are as follows:
1. Review and focus on the crises you have encountered in your relationship, that is, the moments when you quarreled or felt insecure. This will help you find shortcuts and ways to change.
2. To commemorate the moments when your hearts are connected and attracted to each other, no matter how big or small, the things to do include: First, think carefully about the interactions in daily life that encourage the two of you to open up, respond to each other, and give you affection. bring positive impact; the second clearly expresses the turning point that has deepened the love between the two in recent days.
3. Pay attention to the ritual and tacit understanding of separation and reunion, such as giving each other a hug when you go home, or other interactions to strengthen the sense of ritual.
4. Help each other identify issues related to emotional attachment: review where disagreements and disputes occur repeatedly and see how to prevent them in the future and how to Build mutual security. For example, discuss what you are arguing about, and ask the other person if they feel safe, and listen to the other person share their emotions.
5. Create a love story with a compound relationship. When the relationship breaks down, everyone will hold their own opinions. As long as the two people still have feelings and feel safe, they can jointly create a compound story with both parties as the protagonists. Review the reason for the quarrel between the two in the story.
6. Create a future-tense love story: Both parties can talk about their respective ideals in the next 3-5 years and how they hope their lover will support them.
After doing this, you will find that you still love her so much. The previous feelings of not loving her anymore and having no freshness will also disappear. I think this must be a big deal. What do you think of the harvest?
