Many people actually enter the marriage hall ignorantly, but after marriage they find that marriage is completely different from love. In this case, it is easy for the marriage to break up due to incompatibility with the marriage. Therefore, before two people get married, they must know: What is the most important thing in choosing marriage?
1. You will face many problems after getting married
Many people say that they only discover after getting married that a series of problems caused by marriage are far more important and arduous than marriage. Much. When we get married, it is easy to have an illusion: "Thinking that if you marry someone you love, happiness for the rest of your life will be just around the corner."
But what about the reality? It is when we regard marriage as a once-and-for-all thing that we are most likely to be killed by it after marriage. The so-called "love" cannot be used as food at all. Marriage itself is dynamic, full of frustrations, and full of problems of one kind or another.
Why is it not difficult to fall in love? Falling in love is nothing more than "two people have enough to eat and the whole family doesn't have to worry about it." They can go shopping and travel when they have nothing to do, and occasionally travel during holidays. Spending money is like water, and there is no need to think too much. As long as you are with someone who has good character and respects and loves each other, you are simply enjoying the benefits of youth.
And what about marriage? To be very realistic, two people will immediately transition from the "novice mode" of dating to the "hell mode" of marriage. After you get married, you have to face many problems such as loan pressure, children's education, and support for the elderly. Which is more urgent and important than marriage?
Want to play a game while taking a break? Come on, your children still need help with their homework!
Want to use some spare money to buy a bag? Forget it, if you don’t repay the loan, your credit score will be affected!
Want to take a quick trip? Dream on, if your boss doesn’t let you work overtime on weekends, it will be a blessing!
It’s not that we stop falling in love after marriage, but that a series of problems that arise after marriage are far more important than marriage, so that many married couples have no time to think about “love or not,” "Is it important?" These innocuous things. Everyone is immersed in dealing with life, and there is no time to compare "what is the most important".
2. Marriage needs to be managed well
Marriage means the change of social status of two people, from children being taken care of to two people who need to take care of others in an instant. Apart from our partners, we have no one to talk to, because what we are experiencing is what others once called a life of "old people at the top and children at the bottom."
How should we balance the relationship between home and work?
How should we balance family expenses and steadily improve the quality of life?
How should we educate children well?For a person who is useful to society?
How should we comfort our parents? How to plan for the future? How......
Compared with these problems, we have no time to think about "which one is the most important", and marriage cannot be powered by love. To operate perfectly, two people need to solve one problem after another in order to maintain the most basic foundation of life.
Let me tell you something very true:
A real marriage does not motivate you to give because it is important. and operations.
But only if you learn to give and manage first, can you be qualified to talk about whether it is important or not.
Therefore, "The real test of marriage is not the degree to which two people love each other, but the ability to love each other."
The essence of marriage is actually that two people love each other. People who manage their lives silently enjoy the pain and joy brought by marriage, while only those who turn good days into resentment constantly complain to others about "why their marriage is so unfair." True happiness is a process of being self-centered and spreading outward to love and infect others.
