I don’t know if you have heard of the word overpaying. It doesn’t matter if you haven’t. We can probably guess its meaning from the literal meaning. What the editor wants to tell you today is, don’t overpay in a relationship, because even if you overpay, it won’t make the relationship last.
1. Whether it is a relationship or a marriage, it cannot be maintained without mutual respect and dedication from each other, but many people However, they found that when they tried to maintain an intimate relationship with dedication, the relationship became increasingly fragile and on the verge of collapse.
A friend once asked me why the other party could never see why he had given so much? Why did he still choose to leave me?
In fact, maybe it was because Your excessive dedication brought this relationship to an end.
2. The link becomes weak
Love is a rubber band. You and your partner are the ones pulling both ends of the rubber band. Only when both parties use the same strength can the rubber band be strong. Maintain stability.
However, if one party gives too much and loves too hard, then the rubber band between the two will be stretched thinner and thinner, and the link between them will become weaker and weaker. , there will be a risk of breakage.
1. The cost of love is reduced
In a certain respect, the cost of love in an intimate relationship can be called the cost of love, whether it is time, money or energy. One of the costs. The cost of maintaining a relationship is fixed. When you pay too much, the cost of love paid by the other party will decrease.
The concept of sunk cost tells us that the more you pay, the more reluctant you are to give up and can only choose to continue paying. Therefore, if the cost of the other person's love is very low, then the price he pays for abandoning this relationship is also very low. As soon as such people lose interest in a relationship, they can easily let it go.
2. Givers will feel tired
For those who over-give, giving is for getting Give back. Maybe they will pay for the stability of the relationship at first, but when their long-term efforts are not responded to, they will become very tired inside.
It can be said that over-givers are actually burning all their enthusiasm for the relationship. When the enthusiasm is exhausted, they will easily have the idea of ????leaving.
3. The other party will feel pressure
In the process of over-giving, one party will have a desire to control the other party, and this desire for control will put a lot of pressure on people. Once the other party cannot bear this kind of pressure, they will regain control of their own life by escaping from the relationship.
Third, if you want to maintainIn a relationship, unilateral efforts will never succeed. We must let our partners understand their responsibilities and assume their own responsibilities.
If you have begun to give too much, then you must understand that only those who love themselves can get the love of others. Shift your attention to yourself and return your partner's tasks to your partner.
